Every now and then someone asks me point-blank: “Jason, what the hell’s the point of this whole Tribe idea?”

Fair question. While I could talk for hours about rites, fire metaphors, collective legacy, and sacred systems of mutual aid, there’s a much simpler answer.

The Tribe exists so you can finally stop hiding.

At its core, this is about living in a space where your inner world and outer expression align; where who you are on the inside doesn’t have to wear armor to walk through the day. We are our most powerful, attractive, useful, and fulfilled selves when we stop performing for systems that were never built for us in the first place.

But that kind of life? It doesn’t happen in isolation. It happens in community.

The real trick, and this is the paradox most people never resolve, is that the kind of tribe where you’re fully seen and accepted tends to form most easily with people like you. Similar values, similar wounds, similar rhythms of thought. That’s where safety blooms. But here’s the catch: the strongest tribes aren’t built from sameness. They’re built from strategic difference. The kind of difference that sharpens rather than divides.

So how do we create a space where you’re fully accepted and the Tribe is made stronger by your differences?

It starts by redefining what makes someone “like you.”

Not job. Not political alignment or favorite podcast. Not gender. Not religion.

Disposition.

The best people in my life, the ones who have walked with me from childhood to career to chaos, aren’t copies of each other. But they all share this trait: they are aligned. Their actions match their essence. Their personality feels inhabited. They carry a sense of rightness, even if the world doesn’t always understand it. And that, more than anything, is what makes someone feel like kin.

Lately, I’ve been thinking a lot about gender roles and how they tie into all this.

A few days ago, someone on Reddit wrote about how much they hate being boxed in by invisible rules about how men and women are “supposed” to behave. Their post nailed something I’ve felt for decades: most people aren’t choosing their life, they’re reenacting what was handed to them. And nowhere is this more visible than in the quiet pressure to “perform” your gender. Women who are assertive get labeled cold. Men who are soft get labeled weak. The boxes don’t fit, but the punishment for breaking out is real.

What makes this conversation even trickier is that gender roles aren’t just social scripts. They emerged from biological reality. Evolutionary psychology calls this sexual dimorphism, the fact that our bodies, brains, and instincts developed differently across time. We carried different loads. We served different functions. And even today, that shows up most powerfully in the domain of sexual and romantic attraction.

Masculine and feminine polarity is one of the strongest natural forces shaping desire. Most people are drawn to an opposite complement. Polarity creates charge. Erase it, and the current dies. That’s why so many relationships lose their spark when both partners try to blend into the same middle ground.

But the answer isn’t to rigidly cling to outdated roles. The answer is to master your core disposition and then selectively borrow traits from the other side.

A man who leads with strength but can show vulnerability in rare, intimate moments? That’s a unicorn.
A woman who radiates warmth but can draw a sword when necessary? Also a unicorn.

These are not contradictions. They are mastery. It’s the full use of a psychological toolkit most people never unlock.

That’s why I’ve started scrapping the word “gender” in my work, and replacing it with “disposition.” Gender is political. Disposition is personal. It’s not about conforming to your sex, your era, or your cultural context. It’s about tuning your life to what actually feels true, and then building your relationships, your rituals, and your tribe around that truth.

Because when you’re surrounded by people who accept your disposition, whether it’s mainstream or rare, you become more you. And the Tribe becomes more whole.

So yeah, the Tribe of the Fire is still forming. It’s messy, mythic, and incomplete. But it’s already doing what it was designed to do:
Giving people a space where being real is not punished, but celebrated. Where your quirks don’t isolate you. They strengthen the circle.

That’s the point.

If you want to participate in this social experiment, join our Facebook Group here. Just make sure you answer the membership questions.

~Jason

###